Day 05: A time you thought about ending your own life.
It’s a difficult topic to bring up, so I’ll just spare some of the details and get right to the point. It was probably elementary school and some of middle school. I felt mistreated by someone I cared about and angry at the person who left; all in all, it was family problems. I couldn’t bring myself to go through with it because I had hope that there was something more than what I was living and that things would change. :)
Honestly, I don’t care for it. I’ve contemplated on the idea of religion for quite a while now, but I can’t seem to find a middle ground of acceptance for any of them. There is however, philosophy behind religion that I can stand by. Other than that, everything else just seems convoluted to me. All these concepts of heaven and hell… just saying but reincarnation seems more practical; not the idea that because you were bad when alive, you’ll be reincarnated into a bug or something insignificant for you sins, rather your “life” will be recycled and put back in/on the earth for other purposes in a sense. Like everything else that lives and dies, why are humans so special that some believe we’ll be placed in heaven or hell depending on the good or evil we’ve done when alive? Why account all the good or bad things that happen the direct result of the decisions of a higher being, when really, shit happens and in all seriousness, for a reason? Why need an incentive to be a good person, better yet. Sometimes, I think we’d be better off without religion… but then again, a lot of good that comes from it would be loss. I guess you can’t have the good without the bad.
Drugs: If you’re not medically in need of it, don’t use it. It’ll fuck you up, make you dumb, make you miserable for even starting in the first place and oh, kill you.
Alcohol: On occasion, holidays, family get together’s, or special events, I don’t find it a big deal. But there are people I worry about; those who drink frequently, maybe even classified as alcoholics, need help. It’s really funny how you don’t see how it affects you until it’s too late. That might be a cliche to say, but it’s true. Before you know it, you’re saying hello to kidney disease and heart problems. Don’t think it’ll happen to you? That’s what they all say…